Thursday, July 31, 2008

Stand Down Margaret/ Tony/ Gordon/ David

These are interesting days over at
The Guardian's 'Comment is Free' site

First there was Charlton Brooker's smug and excruciatingly unfunny piece on 9/11 Conspiraloons which drew 1,778 warmly appreciative comments in next to no time...

And now there's David Milliband's equally smug, but slightly funnier (unintentionally) piece, on why the Labour Government isn't really an unholy incarnation of Pure Evil...

...743 adoring comments and counting

Forget about oil and gas shortages, if things carry on like this we'll reach Peak Tinfoil long before the hydrocarbons run out

Though, in fairness, there was a division of opinion between Loon and Anti-Loon in the comments underneath the 9/11 article

No such division of opinion underneath the Milliband piece

Everyone is fucked off with David and the Labour Party

Even members of the Labour Party

The penny has finally dropped

It would seem that calls to support the Labour Party, however wicked its actions, simply because it isn't the Conservative Party just won't cut it any more

which makes for an interesting situation

Even in their worst days, previous fucked up administrations retained at least a core of loyal, grassroots supporters

Not so this time round


  • Who do you vote for when you finally realise that you're living in what is effectively an unrepresentative single party state, or do you just not bother?
  • What do you do when you just can't pay your monthly bills any more?
  • And what are the guys who run that single party state going to come up with to preempt your decisions?


and whilst on the subject of past fucked-up administrations, fellow blogger Merkin made a couple of amusing comments underneath the Milliband piece; including one which made reference to 'Stand Down Margaret' by The Beat

  • Stand Down Margaret - released 1980
  • Margaret - stands down 1990

Ah, the power of popular music

Here's a clip of ex Beat member Dave Wakeling doing an acoustic version of SDM last year. There's a little sliver of ad libbing at the end which nicely captures that sense of 'what the fuck was that all about?' now being experienced by a lot of people who worked so hard to help the current government into power

plus ca change


Saturday, July 26, 2008

Never Mind the Bollocks

Edit (30/7/08): "This video is no Longer available on Youtube" :(

but if you're quick you'll be able to catch this latest incarnation of the Jesus consciousness live and uncut...

"Sermon on the Mount

The Messiah will be giving the Sermon on the Mount, this Friday.

Time: 7:00pm
Date: 1 August 2008
Place: Roseberry Toppping (nr Nunthorpe, Cleveland)

Eleven years earlier -- to the day -- David was suddenly arrested in France at the request of the British government after offering Tony Blair evidence of MI6 funding associates of Osama Bin Laden in Libya to carry out an assassination, which went wrong killing innocent people.

Dave Shayler

PS grateful if receipients could spread this as widely as possible. You may not want to hear a message of love and salvation but others might."

edit #2: David's videos are now back with an additional two minutes of even more invaluable Enlightenment (thx CQG)

and it's just dawned on me what the jerky, heavily edited style of these Messianic bulletins was reminding me of...

Is it me or is the room getting bigger?


Friday, July 25, 2008

Knock off Nigel

Meanwhile, over at The Pirate Bay...

Yo ho ho...


Thursday, July 24, 2008

mainstream conspiraloons #666 - Melanie Phillips

Melanie Phillips

Already the holder of a Conspiraloon Alliance Lifetime Achievement Award for the simple, yet brilliant, idea of giving The Protocols of the Elders of Zion a new lease of life by doing a quick 'search (Jew) and replace (Muslim)' in her favourite word processor, Melanie Philips has now earned a tinfoil cluster to add to that award with her brilliant and incisive take in Der Schpectator on what's really going on in Scottish politics...

A Caledonian caliphate? (25/6/08)

"...Tomorrow, the Scottish Islamic Foundation will be launched in Edinburgh in Salmond’s presence. But as the invaluable Centre for Social Cohesion tells us, the leading members of this group and many of those who lead its events are closely linked to the Muslim Brotherhood, whose aim is the Islamisation of Britain and Europe.

Its chief executive Osama Saeed, who has worked as Salmond’s researcher and is the SNP’s parliamentary candidate for Glasgow Central, is an Islamist and leading light in the Brotherhood front the Muslim Association of Britain...

... The Salmond/Saeed axis is not merely a disturbing sign of Salmond’s own prejudices. It has a potential strategic significance that goes beyond Scotland. The Brotherhood’s strategy for Britain is to promote separate Islamic development, declare sharia-only enclaves and infiltrate mainstream institutions as a springboard for Islamising the entire society. Since Salmond’s aim is to make Scotland independent from the rest of the United Kingdom, with one leap the Brothers could achieve an Islamised country on England’s border."

The sneaky bastards

though, as single leaps go, it would have to be on the largish side

Glasgow 2020?

and it's all the more fiendish and cunning a plan for the total subjugation of England when you consider that Muslims currently make up less than one per cent of the population of Scotland


Dr Dragon - an update

Yes, that website I linked to in my last post is indeed a hoax

and yes, I did think it was iffy when I linked to it
(42 pages of unrelenting porn spam on the site forum was a bit of a clue) but no more iffy than any of the other Karadžić coverage we've been blasted with over the last few days

Radovan Karadžić

And if you're willing to believe that someone as infamous as Karadžić managed to live amongst his adoring countryfolk unrecognized for over a decade, thanks to the magical cloaking powers of a really big bushy beard, you're also probably willing to believe that he's going to be allowed to dish the dirt in open court on all the grubby little deals he was party to

Just like Saddam Hussein did(n't)


Wednesday, July 23, 2008

(Hoax) Website of the Month - Psy Help Energy

The fascinating and informative official website of one of the most prominent experts in the field of alternative medicine, bioenergy and macrobiotic diet; including a stylish range of cock-shaped power amulets...

the only wee drawbacks being

- it's written in Serbian

- the website owner (?), a certain Radovan Karadžić, is about to set off on a business trip to the Hague for the next couple of years; followed by a convenient conviction and/ or an equally convenient heart attack

There is a very active user website forum though - just jam packed full of spam porn ads and pictures of scary looking bearded men and the occasional atrocity

Dildo necklaces and bearded scarymen aside, I'm having a little trouble deciding which is harder to swallow...

1. The notion that Karadžić was able to spend the last ten years wandering around Belgrade, drinking in his local cafe with his framed (pre beard) picture on the wall, completely unrecognized by everyone around him, Bananas style; simply because he'd grown a beard. Yes, I really believe that


2. The sheer, nauseating hypocrisy of the blanket media coverage which has the brass cheek to describe Karadžić as Europe's worst war criminal since 1945

Off the top of my head I can think of at least one European politician guilty of war crimes with a much higher body count to his name

...arguably less popular with his former electorate than Karadžić though


Tuesday, July 22, 2008

La Conspiration Mondial

A little something from Montreal on the subject of every conspiraloon's favourite private surveillance contractor...

Liberté! Egalité! Conspiraloonaté!

Verint Systems
was reportedly put in charge of London Underground's CCTV cameras in 2004

Those would be the CCTV cameras that apparently didn't work on 7/7 and also on 22/7 when JCdM was shot in the face by persons unknown, lots

The people behind the short clip above have put together a much (much) longer sequence of videos dedicated to Verint but as they make repeated reference to the Mossad (the flame to the Loon moth) I won't be posting a link to them here. Not when a perfectly good Conspiraloon Alliance blog has been set up for that sort of thing

I don't pretend to know if anyone at Verint has any special knowledge about what happened on 7/7

Verint is, however...

- spooky as fuck and associated with more than its fair share of ex(?)-NSA types

- owned by Comverse, a company set up by a crook which was delisted from NASDAQ because of fraud

- operating in London Underground on a contract awarded to it whilst ex(?)-CIA man Bob Kiley was in charge of London Transport

None of which is very cool


I was chatting with a few fellow loons a few days ago on the subject of 'who watches the watchers?' and the apparent over-representation of Israeli companies in the high-tech security business came up in conversation

You could very easily argue that circumstances dictate that the Israelis and the ex(?) NSA types who set these kinds of businesses up have experience which gives them a perfectly explicable head start with this sort of thing

But it still makes me twitchy

And, unlike London Transport and the Montreal Transit System, I personally try to avoid turning over the keys to all my confidential data to possible/ probable spook bastards (of any nationality) wherever possible

A couple of recent, relatively trivial, examples...

ZoneAlarm Firewall software - owned by Checkpoint Software and busted for sending encrypted data about users back to Mummy without asking their permission beforehand (though this unfortunate incident is no longer recorded in Wikipedia and therefore, arguably, never actually happened)

Fring - a package which enables users to talk and chat using Skype, ICQ, Google Talk, MSN Messenger, AIM and Yahoo Messenger on their smartphones. To my knowledge, Fring hasn't actually been caught out doing anything wrong but about two seconds after I loaded it onto my phone I asked myself was I really happy plugging in all my user IDs and passwords into a single piece of software which some apparently very altruistic people in a far off land were making available to me for free?

Fring is no longer installed on my phone

Open source
would, wherever possible, definitely appear to be the way to go


Saturday, July 19, 2008

Charlton Broooker revisited

Cheers to anon for sharing a link to a reply in The Guardian to that pile of sh*t published by Charlton Brooker last week...

That critical mass of people who reject the blanket, stochastic treatment of
everything that happens in the world as being stuff that 'just happens' because everyone in charge of things is supposedly an idiot (except for the Islamic terrorists, obviously) - as peddled by smug bell-ends like Charlton - is almost there


...and yes, I appreciate that calling someone like Charlton a big, daft, floppy cock is no substitute for reasoned argument and evidence

Charlton Brooker

but, every now and again, the fact you are considered fair game, as an individual or as part of a group, to be slandered as having mental problems, holding racist views or being some kind of ghoulish jackal for the simple act of questioning some of the crap you're told by proven liars is a bit too rich to digest .

After all, we're all only human

...except for the reptilian alien overlords all of us conspiracy theorists believe in, obviously


edit: but wait, there's more...


Don't talk to the Cops

And whilst on the subject of Kafka-esque criminal justice systems, thanks to Tony for sharing a link to a couple of videos with the theme 'don't talk to the cops'

The first clip is a presentation by a hyperactive American law lecturer, who if he's not on drugs should be, explaining why suspects, even the totally innocent (if such people actually exist), should never volunteer information to the police.

The second clip features a remarkably candid policeman sharing an insight into suspect interview techniques and some of his favourite, er, lies he uses in his interviews

Whilst the legislation mentioned in the clips is specific to the US, to the best of my knowledge most of the principles discussed apply just as much to the UK

...except that our law enforcement agencies get to lock people up for a lot longer in the UK and therefore have a lot more time to work some of the special magic described in these videos on Evil Doers

Because, as we know, police all over the world only ever arrest people who've done something wrong

They might take their time figuring out what exactly but they get there in the end

and remember boys and girls, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law - but never for you


Friday, July 18, 2008

There are children here somewhere. I can smell them

Cheers to anon for sharing a most entertaining link to a new government web site, '
the site where where 16-25's can have their say about identity issues in the UK'

Oh, dear - is there anything quite so cringeworthy as half-arsed, vaguely sinister attempts at grown-ups trying to be 'with it' through encouraging the production of material 'by young people, for young people', whilst the grown ups continue to lurk in the background brandishing a big fuck off stick, just in case

In the word's of anon...

"It's obviously a serious attempt to really listen to what our young people have to say about this vital issue. So when Jacqui reads the messageboard she'll get the message loud and clear won't she? -

- Proving my age is a very different thing to proving my identity
- This is blatant government propaganda
- This site is government propanda
- Shop Assistants using the need to show ID to bully people
- The Nation ID Register is not secure - here's just one powerful reason
- How can you stop civil servants peeking
- I'd rather emmigrate or go to prison
- Don't want one either
- Why centralised?
- Disagree with ID Cards and hav your post removed
- Don't want, Won't have
- Creepy
- Stopping the ID card scheme
- I don't trust you.
- Civil Disobedience

Warms the cockles of the heart it does."

Yes, yes it does. As did the first reply (and avatar) to this thread asking '
Tell us a little bit more about yourself'

anon goes on to say...

"Arrg the way the moderator on that id site is trying to massage the debate is asbolutly blatant and creepy:

Hi British Nick,

I understand what you say about a card not being able to stop a person from making an actual bomb. This can still happen!

I wish that the new system would stop terrorists altogether. It might be more difficult to gain access to the country from the EU if passports have chips with an individuals face and eye scans and fingerprints on. This might stop unwanted people (terrorists) coming into the country???

It will be annoying that we have to have our fingerprints taken as well.

Do you think that holding information on a central database is better than lots of different paperwork? Is this not safer and easier?

Let us know

Cheers mate.

The faux open minded chumminess particularly."

Once more, I can only agree. I haven't felt quite so creeped out since the last time I sat with my little niece playing in Club Penguin

but that's another story

which I will doubtlessly end up sharing with my new 'mates' over at


Thursday, July 17, 2008

Der Process

"As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from uneasy dreams he found himself transformed in his bed into a monstrous vermin"

I heartily recommend reading a couple of Lord Patel's recent posts on the subjects of our ever-diminishing civil liberties, David Davis, Shami Chakrabarti and the Curious Case of the Haltemprice By-Election...

David Davis - Another blody silly conspiracy theory from Lord Patel

Queen ready to give Assent to Criminal Evidence (Witness Anonymity) Bill - Rush to judgement - Liberty be damned !!!!

I have little doubt that we've just been exposed to a severe dose of distractive jigaboo over in Haltemprice but the specific objectives of that operation are debatable

The consensus among people I've discussed Haltemprice with is that it positioned Davis as being the potential spokesperson for all those traditional Conservative supporters who are starting to feel the pinch, economically and socially, and might start cutting up a little rough real soon now...

  • Shami's in place to cover the faux-Leftie chattering classes
  • David's on board to appeal to all the barking ex Army Majors and Little Englanders out there

If you're going to spend billions turning an entire country into an open prison, it makes sense to spend what would be petty cash on ensuring that any dissent against that program is channeled through an establishment sanctioned opposition movement. A movement which does a nice line in T-shirts and vapid publicity stunts but not much else

Lord Patel, however, suggests that Haltemprice may have had a specific as well as a general objective and points out that Davis' little stunt acted as a very effective smokescreen for the passage of the Criminal Evidence (Witness Anonymity) Bill

...because if you're going to be locked up without charge and tried without jury what's the point in knowing who your accusers are?

There's been a lot of talk about Nineteen Eighty Four and Big Brother of late.

My take is that, like the catastrophic failure of the banking system, Big Brother is already a done deal and the mainstream media, as usual and per the script, are taking their time telling us about that which has already happened

The Orwell back catalogue is already pretty much exhausted

We're moving onto Kafka next


Monday, July 14, 2008

Are you sitting comfortably? Then we'll begin



Segway Troopers

I've just followed a link from the b3ta board to an absolutely excellent (though browser-chokingly large) series of photos of Chinese anti-terrorism preparations for the Beijing Olympics

Surface to Air Missiles, flamethrowers, these guys aren't mucking about

Obviously, the Chinese are decades behind the kind of sophisticated anti-terrorism techniques employed by the West; such as bombing and invading other countries, shooting electricians in the face, confiscating hair gel and emptying machine guns into crowds of innocent bystanders, but it's impressive stuff nevertheless

For some reason, this image exerted a particularly strong pull on my imagination...


Charlton Brooker, one serious tool

A little something for fellow Loons who've recommended the output of journalist/ commentator Charlie (nee Charlton) Brooker to me over the years...

(Charlton is the bloke who went on tele last year and sneered at all the people withdrawing their life savings from Northern Rock for being idiots)

Charlton is a little put out that he's started to bump into 'intelligent, level-headed people' who have doubts about the official narrative of 9/11

Only they can't be 'intelligent, level-headed people' because Charlton doesn't share their views

It's possible that the timing of Brooker's piece has something to do with the recent BBC WTC7 documentary, which I take to be excellent news

I think it's reasonable to conclude that more people now have doubts about 9/11 than did last year and by next year even more people will be on board

As for Brooker's piece itself - he shows no genuine wit or originality and quotes strictly from the pre-existing script about parapolitical conspiracies being impossible because no organisation would be competent enough to keep a large-scale conspiracy secret

All very tedious, and increasingly desperate, fare

And an interesting exercise in circular logic from someone who's supposed to be clever...

'You can't have found evidence of a conspiracy because if the conspiracy existed someone would have found some evidence'

or rather, what Charlton is really saying...

' of my journalistic-media-whore mates would have found some evidence'

and if any Brooker fans have any doubts about where he's coming from and who he's batting for, the last few lines of his piece make that pretty clear...

"Embrace a conspiracy theory and suddenly you're part of a gang sharing privileged information; your sense of power and dignity rises a smidgen and this troublesome world makes more sense, for a time. You've seen through the matrix! At last you're alive! You ARE the Emperor of Pluto after all!

Except - ahem - you're only deluding yourself, your majesty. Because to believe the "system" is trying to control you is to believe it considers you worth controlling in the first place. The reality - that "the man" is scarcely competent enough to control his own bowels, and doesn't give a toss about you anyway - is depressing and emasculating; just another day in the cardboard box factory. And that's no place for an imaginary emperor, now, is it?"

A stunning, insightful revelation which will no doubt come as a great comfort to anyone around the world who's been imprisoned for their views, works in a sweatshop or has lost the occasional limb in an airstrike


Sunday, July 13, 2008

It's Jigaboo Time - pt 11,428

'The World's Greatest Newspaper'

and for those who prefer the less geopolitically demanding taste of Domestic Jigaboo to International Jigaboo, may I humbly recommend...

Someone asked in a comment on this blog a few days ago...

I didn't get round to answering at the time but the answer is 'yes, yes it is'


The BBC, respecting its audience's intelligence since 1922 - pt2

This is a video of a chap called Barry Jennings

Barry worked in WTC7 and was unlucky enough to get trapped in WTC7 for a few hours before it collapsed on 9/11

Barry featured heavily in the BBC Conspiracy Files documentary last week about the collapse of WTC7

What wasn't at all clear was what the makers of the documentary were trying to tell us with the clips of Barry they showed.

Barry's account was heavily edited and the context of what he was saying was not properly explained. An attempt was certainly made, however, to leave viewers with the impression that Barry's account of his experiences on 9/11, whatever they actually were, had been misrepresented by 9/11 conspiracy theorists

If you take the time to play the above two-part Youtube video of an unedited interview with Barry things are a lot clearer - and get particularly interesting four minutes into the second part

What Barry is saying is that, on 9/11, WTC7 suffered from a series of internal explosions and started disintegrating internally before WTC1 collapsed and damaged WTC7

If Barry's account is accurate WTC7 was not destroyed as the result of two airliners hitting the twin towers

Of course, all the usual caveats about placing too much faith in any eye witness testimony, for or against any position you hold, or trusting anything put out by the Loose Change crew apply

As they do with...

This is a video of a chap called John Schroeder

John was a New York fireman working in WTC1 on the morning of 9/11

John has lots of interesting things to say about what he saw in WTC1 and believes that the lower levels of the building had been badly damaged by something other than the plane strike 'eighty floors above'

John reportedly lost five of his immediate workmates that day, as well as 40% of his lung capacity and maybe some of his marbles from breathing in toxic crap.

It would be interesting to see if any BBC television producers or any other conspiracy theory debunkers would have the cheek to accuse John of being an insensitive ghoulish jackal or a friend of the terrorists for expressing doubts about the official narrative of a terrorist atrocity.

Come to think of it, if what the likes of John and Barry are saying is true it's the BBC television producers who are the insensitive ghoulish jackals

Actually, they'd be something much worse than that

John has not featured heavily in any episodes of the BBC Conspiracy Files


Saturday, July 12, 2008

The BBC, respecting its audience's intelligence since 1922

This is a picture of a chap called Mark Loizeaux

Mark Loizeaux runs one of the world's leading demolition companies, Controlled Demolition Incorporated, and holds the world record for bringing down the largest steel structure, the J L Hudson building in Detroit (WTC1 and 2 apparently didn't count when the records were being handed out)

Mark featured heavily in the BBC Conspiracy Files documentary last week about the collapse of WTC7 on 9/11

Mark explained that WTC7 couldn't have been brought down as the result of a deliberately planned demolition, even though the collapse looked like a deliberately planned demolition, because an operation like that...

'would take months to design and months to prepare the structure for the placement of charges'


'hundreds of explosive charges along with miles of initiating cable and miles more detonating cord'

and thermate charges couldn't have been used to deliberately take down WTC7 because Mark couldn't see...

'how you could possibly get all of the columns to melt through at the same time'

Mark clearly has a point. Without months of meticulous planning and poring over architectural plans, more months of placing hundreds of charges with geometrical care, and the use of sophisticated firing mechanisms which ensured that the charges were detonated with milliseconds of accuracy, you'd have to be out of your box to think anyone could have taken WTC7 down with such precision

Not when someone could have achieved the same level of precision just by running around the building and setting a few desks on fire


David on David

A mercifully pandimensional lizard-free extract from David Icke speaking at Haltemprice last Sunday, where he goes into the hobbies of some of the people supporting David Davis' noble and principled stand against Big Brother...

Icke includes a little chunk of material I pushed out onto to the Interweb which was subsequently ripped-off by The Independent

A few people asked me at time why I wasn't pissy about not receiving any acknowledgment

The answer is that I'm just satisfied that the connection I identified received some publicity. This is a personal blog and I have neither the time nor inclination to maintain a level, consistency or quality of output which would merit wide scale attention. I am happy with the way things are

What I am not happy with is that basic investigative research into a national event such as the Haltemprice By Election is left to a handful of people tapping on keyboards in their spare rooms and a bloke who, for reasons I can only guess at, blends that basic research with talk of alien overlords in human bodysuits


More (More) The The - aka If only Matt Johnson did weather forecasts...

Thanks to The Antagonist for reminding me of this other little number from The The's prophetic Matt Johnson...

They're 5 miles high as the crow flies
leavin' vapour trails against a blood red sky
Movin' in from the East toward the West
with Balaclava helmets over their heads, yes!

But if you think that Jesus Christ is coming
Honey you've got another thing coming
If he ever finds out who's hi-jacked his name
He'll cut out his heart and turn in his grave

Islam is rising
The Christians mobilising
The world is on its elbows and knees
It's forgotten the message and worships the creeds

It's war, she cried, It's war, she cried, this is war
Drop your possessions, all you simple folk
You will fight them on the beaches in your underclothes
You will thank the good lord for raising the union jack
You'll watch the ships sail out of harbour
and the bodies come floating back

If the real Jesus Christ were to stand up today
He'd be gunned down cold by the C.I.A.
Oh, the lights that now burn brightest behind stained glass
Will cast the darkest shadows upon the human heart
But God didn't build himself that throne
God doesn't live in Israel or Rome
God doesn’t belong to the yankee dollar
God doesn't plant the bombs for Hezbollah
God doesn't even go to church
And God won't send us down to Allah to burn
No, God will remind us what we already know
That the human race is about to reap what it's sown

The world is on its elbows and knees
It's forgotten the message and worships the creeds
Armageddon days are here again

...written in 1988

(That's Johnny Marr on guitar - the man behind the guitar work on The Smiths' How Soon is Now - described as '
The Stairway to Heaven of the Eighties' and best consumed drunk in a lonely bedroom after a washout Saturday night. Also now available in a jaw-droppingly bad Russian lesbian schoolgirl version)