Feeling Guilty

I’ve only just posted it and I already feel guilty about slapping up a 900 word dissection of Mark Urban’s latest piece on the London Bombings on Newsnight.

But what am I to do? I spent most of the night serenaded by the sound of dozens of police cars attending the latest round of anti-terror raids down the road. There’s a surveillance helicopter flying above my head right now. So what am I going to blog?

For breakfast today I ate … muesli.

No, no I didn’t. I didn’t eat breakfast today because I overslept after being kept awake by the sound of the massed security forces hunting down the sucide bombers who are, in all probability, hiding somewhere near here.

See what I mean?

I tried watching television as a distraction. What was on? Rambo III. You know, the sequel set in Afghanistan where the ferocious, yet noble and friendly, Islamic freedom fighters fight the evil Russian oppressors with Rambo’s help.

My, how fucking times change.

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Anyway, what zany and amusing links do I have on hand to post up in compensation for that last post, focused as it is on distressing things like terror bombings?

How about…

The announcement of the introduction of caffeinated beer to the UK. Yeah, and I could do with a drink or two after all those bomb scares

The apparently unrelated story that balding, tubby men are to be used in drinks ads (yay!) to make the products less appealing to women. Maybe we should just ban alcohol altogether and see if those Muslim psychos will stop bombing us

Listen to a mp3 recording of a retro-tastic album entitled ‘Picking Up Girls Made Easy’. Obviously, you’d have to stone them to death afterwards, the Jezebels, to avoid anyone laying a fatwah on your arse.

Look at a photo of a weird cloud formation in Nebraska, which kind of looks like the building in the foreground has just been bombed.

Play the can you guess how much my collection of Tesco’s Value Range groceries cost game. I did pretty well at that as I’ve just restocked the house in case the transport infrastructure is paralysed by terrorist attacks

And finally, picking out shapes of animals in the London Undergound map. Most of which predate the closure of the Piccadilly Line and sundry stations due to the recent bombings