...which presumably enables patrolling officers to to keep an eye on their 'My E-Bay' screens and to check if anyone has confessed to any crimes on Facebook 24/7 (edit: or grooming teenagers)
And when they get thirsty they can summon Teapot 1 with instant messaging...
Surely, it's only a matter of time before someone starts producing a collectible range of scale models of all these fabulous new vehicles the Met is putting on the streets
Whilst at the Elephant and Castle yesterday I availed myself of a copy of the South London Press and I was put out to discover that its latest headline was actually nothing to do with today's mayoral election :(
And whilst on the subject of the Elephant and Castle and scrupulously incorruptible public officials, the good news for local residents is that the long anticipated regeneration of the area is now finally about to commence.
The Elephant and Castle Shopping Centre is, and always has been since it was built in 1965, legendarily grim. The E&C is also the focal point of some of most ghastly and gargantuan human filing cabinets ever constructed outside of Moscow.
And in 40 years just about the only thing anyone did to improve the place was to give it a coat of pink paint
But now, after waiting patiently for so long, it would seem that local independent shopkeepers at the E&C are about to receive their just reward and be regenerated, good and hard
There are loads of these all over shops in the E&C...
...though Tescos didn't have one up in their window so nothing too dodgy or unfair can be going on
I grew up just down the road from the E&C, near to Borough Market and regeneration did wonderful things for the local fruit and veg stall holders there. They were regenerated so well that they were transformed into completely different people selling expensive but authentic cockney delicacies such as venison burgers, sea bass and chorizo (the wikipedia entry for Borough Market really is something else - no PR spin there, none whatsoever, c*nts)
I expect equally fantastic results from the porky corruption fest that is and always was going to be the 2012 London Olympics. Local people can look forward to being regenerated all the way to some other rundown shit hole until somebody wants to make some money knocking that down in another 20 or 30 years