The Common Enemy

Further to my previous post about Islamo-Fascist Awareness week and the traditional anti-Muslim knees up being planned in London on 26th October…

One of the reasons why the organisers of the demonstration selected the 26th was to coincide with a rally calling for a referendum of the proposed EU treaty/ Constitution the following day

The implication being that they anticipate a large overlap of those against further EU integration and those who believe that Muslims are taking over the country

Because, as everyone knows, the EU is completely controlled by militant jihadists

Over the weekend, someone very thoughtfully sent me a link to a two hour long film on google video of someone in a church hall making a presentation about how the EU is attacking UK society from within via an entity called ‘Common Purpose’...





Common Purpose is a peculiar wee organisation which provides what it calls 'leadership-training' courses to select individuals within the private and public sector. It also offers extensive networking opportunities to its ‘Graduates’ after their training.

From what little I’ve been able to pick up from the bland yet creepy Common Purpose website and other little snippets I’ve encountered here and there, Common Purpose gives off a vibe of some kind of cross between Scientology, EST therapy, the Stepford Bureaucrats and the Masons

Leadership Training selection process...

Which I would, under other circumstances, find amusing, except for the fact that literally thousands of people from the police, the armed services, the education service, local government, national government, the NHS, and the prison service have all been subject to Common Purpose indoctrination at public expense

And yet hardly anyone has heard of Common Purpose

Common Purpose is also, by its own admission, actively selecting children it judges most likely to be future leaders and giving them a spot of training too

Well, that’s not sinister at all




Common Purpose is part of a much wider malaise and a component of an interlocked network of dodgy think tanks, quangos, lobby groups, and consultancies, populated by the kind of bloodless, sociopathic droids who now dominate our political parties and public sector. I don’t know whether they were born or made but they’re a bunch of fuckers wherever they came from.

Now the problem with the video about Common Purpose I was given the link to and have, in turn, pasted into this post is that the person making the presentation and the people watching it are just a teensy weensy bit, er, reactionary

OK, make that extremely reactionary

Which means that even though quite a lot of decent and informative research is contained within the presentation the conclusions that people in the film draw from that research are shaped by some pretty ropey world views

And this, for me, is the tricky thing. When presented with evidence of the existence of murky, unaccountable and powerful organisations exercising malign influence on our lives, independent Right Wing thinkers will start talking about Marxist conspiracies. Yet, when presented with exactly the same evidence, independent Left Wing thinkers will start talking about Fascist conspiracies

My own take is that Left and Right Wing independent thinkers are hampered by their existing terminology and are therefore both wrong. But, in a way, they’re both correct and they could achieve much if they would look past their differences and realise that they have a Common Enemy in organisations such as Common Purpose and, more to the point, the elitist bastards behind them. If those bastards win we're all fucked - Left and Right Wing alike


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PS As an aside, the last time I posted about Common Purpose, and the equally creepy Tavistock Institute, was back in May. The thread of comments underneath that post catalysed the creation of the Conspiraloon™ Alliance which is destined to one day eat Common Purpose for breakfast and ask for seconds, MuahahahHAAAAA!!!

PPS Conspiraloon™ Thought for the Day (courtesy of JD)...

"both the left wing and the right wing are flapped by - and attached to - the same bird, which unfortunately continues to fly on its chosen course - and we continue to blame its flight upon one of the wings, when blame should be apportioned to a limited degree to both wings, and in particular to the supporting frame to which they are secured, and without which neither would exist"

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Shiny Happy People

Just in case anyone doesn’t know about it yet there are only 28 hating days to go until Islamo-Fascism Awareness Week kicks off

Uh-Oh, We're In Trouble, Something's Come Along And It's Burst Our Bubble
Yeah, Yeah! Uh-Oh, We're In Trouble,
Gotta Get Home Quick March On The Double!

A quick peek at the cast list will give a fair indication of the kind of selfless, humanitarian interest groups and personalities who are behind this little party

Apparently, these interest groups and personalities are profoundly worried about the oppression of women in Islam

Yeah, and I’m fucking Danish




To mark Islamo-Fascism Awareness Week an organisation called Stop Islamisation Of Europe is planning to hold a rally in London on 26th October on the theme of Islamic Persecution…


“Persecuted minority groups likely to be represented are

Armenians
Assyrians
Copts
Hindus
Sikhs
Indonesian Christians

And others

There will be speakers from these groups”


A pretty broad church indeed which seems to include just about everyone except for the Cornish, probably because the Cornish couldn't bear to be in the company of so many foreigners

"Fuck Off"

I’ve never really understood what the expression Islamo-Fascism is supposed to mean. Maybe it’s the Italian, oops sorry, Danish ancestry but I’m a bit old school when it comes to defining Fascism and believe its core feature to be an unholy merger of state and corporate power

and Islam, however extreme, doesn’t qualify.

I believe the expression to be a deliberate exercise in sophistry, crafted to associate Muslims with Nazis and all the pre-packed baggage that goes with that. However, I can’t help thinking that if Islamic fundamentalists really are Fascists they have would probably have quite a lot in common with the people demonstrating against them

Fascists demonstrating against Fascists - what is the world coming to?

Maybe they should all sit down and have a nice cup of tea and a chat

Maybe they could be friends

"Do you know what Islamo-Fascist Man, we're not so different after all and together we're stronger. Now let's go and kick some Commie butt"

And this Islamisation of Europe thing does seem just a teensy wee bit overblown. It’s not as if our governments, media, banks, police forces, armies or legal systems are swarming with Muslims or even likely to be in the foreseeable future

Convenience stores and kebab shops definitely

The organs of state, financial and cultural power, um no, not really

In short, the Islamisation of Europe is lie. A chimera conjured up to distract people from the de-Islamisation of one particular part of the world and to be a focal point for their rage at all the shit that's going on around them

That’s the plan

There’s a lot to be angry about out there but Muslims aren’t responsible

And anyone thinking about joining in with this Islamo-Fascist awareness crap might want to think about who’s yanking their chain and for what reasons

... or are the objectives of a war mongering neo-con lobby and a ruling elite that demonises the lower classes as ‘chavs’, a ruling elite populated by people who view those lower classes as being only slightly less loathsome than shit on their shoe, really worth fighting for?

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Rory Winter has more on this latest exercise is getting two groups of people to stand in a street yelling each other, whilst the Powers That Be get on with the serious business of fucking both groups over here

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Great Minds think alike

From today's Private Eye...

thanks to Lord P.

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edit: and whilst on the subject of banking industry look-alikes, this extract from a post in Scott Adam's blog tickled me for some reason...

Did you hear that scientists discovered a new use for men’s balls? Apparently they are loaded with stem cells.

This is great news because stem cells have potential to help against many health problems. For example, men’s balls might someday help with their strokes.

If you have balls, you have probably looked at them and wondered aloud “What else can I do with them?” Until now, their utility was limited to the following:

1. Producing sperm and male hormones
2. Target for projectiles
3. Sexual stimulation
4. Impersonating Alan Greenspan



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New Customers Only pt3

Thanks to Lord Patel and Paul for pointing me towards Richard Murphy’s ‘Tax Research’ site and a couple of posts on Northern Rock here and here

The posts are a little, um, technical and I’m not at all sure that Murphy has fully supported his conclusions but, even though I think there are some gaps that need filling in, what he has put up indicates outrageous behaviour on the part of Northern Rock’s management…

If you look at Northern Rock’s statement of assets and liabilities for 31st December 2006 (its most recent accounts), its assets comprised…

• Liquid assets 13%
• Residential Mortgages 77%
• Other stuff 10%

(There's an obvious caveat to be made here that all sets of accounts are bollocks, especially audited ones, but sadly it's all people have to go on)

If you look at Northern Rock’s liabilities for the same period they comprised…

• Bonds 46%
• Wholesale Funding 24%
• Depositors’ Cash 22%
• Share Capital 4%
• Bits and bobs 4%

The outrageous part comes from the fact that the bonds, and maybe the wholesale funding (though I can’t see where Murphy demonstrates that) get first call on the residential mortgages in Northern Rock’s books as security in the event of liquidation.

And that seems to have been achieved, at least in part, by issuing the bonds via a supremely shady and complex structure of shell companies referred to by HM Treasury as the 'Granite' securitisation programme.

Northern Rock's favourite rock

The inclusion of a holding trust in the Granite structure which purportedly benefits a Down's Syndrome charity is a nice, if somewhat twisted, touch...




I’m not pretending for a second to understand how the 'Granite' securitisation programme operates. However, at least one of its possible purposes is to ensure that the financiers who lent money to Northern Rock via Granite get first call on Northern Rock’s assets in the event of the company going bust.

So, here’s the funny thing. If Northern Rock does go bust it is very likely that the depositors sit only just below the shareholders in the pecking order for bearing any loss.

And the shareholders stake can only absorb 4% of any loss on the break up and sale of Northern Rock’s assets.

And, generally speaking, fire sales usually command an ever so slightly higher discount than 4%

And then it would be the depositors' turn

And the anonymous people who really fund, really benefit from and probably really control the bank through Granite are nice and safe behind a big fat financial buffer provided by mug punters

I’ve tried to keep things simple but putting it crudely…

• Northern Rock shares are probably worth fuck all, unless you’re daft enough to believe that intangible assets such as the Northern Rock brand or the commercial acumen of its crack, integrity-packed management team are worth something on their own
  

• Until the moment when HM’s Government gave an explicit guarantee to back depositors’ cash, those depositors queuing outside the branches were 100% doing the right thing
  

• Northern Rock’s management team may have employed some seriously grubby and, more to the point, poorly disclosed devices to separate depositors from their money in the event of serious difficulty

The last point is potentially the scariest as it’s hard to believe that Northern Rock is the only retail bank out there with this kind of shit in place. If people get wise to what Northern Rock was up to the next logical step is to find out which other banks have done something similar and yank deposits out of them as well, pdq

Hmmm, that could be fun

Let's all play the 'Hunt the thinly capitalised bank with shady, complex offshore funding arrangements and start a catastrophic bank run' game

It’s also worth pondering upon the fact that ordinary cash depositors are the only fuckers out there dumb enough to lend commercial institutions money without demanding either security or a level of return commensurate with a risky, unsecured loan.

When Northern Rock lends money to people, for instance, it demands their house deeds in exchange. On the other hand, the ordinary people who lend money to Northern Rock via their deposits are given a pretty little book with their name and some numbers printed in it in exchange for their money...

How fucking stupid is that?

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Blobfish's Human of the Month

I've kindly allowed Blobfish access to my blogger account so that he(?) can have his own blog and run his(?) own 'Human of the Month' feature in parallel with my own much sought-after 'Fish of the Month/ Week/ Day' award

And it should come as no surprise that Blobfish's first ever Human of the Month is...

Alisher Usmanov!!

Alisher's the one wearing glasses btw

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edit: this is nothing to do with Usmanov but thanks to b. for leaving a link to this important message by way of a comment




Go there now!! and be informed

And then play it to small children

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edit #2: Now available on Youtube!! - my Joy is complete...




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The Police - Your Friendly Guides

and, remember, no-one should have any problems with being filmed or put on a database if they've got nothing to hide

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New Customers Only pt2

Yet another satisfied Northern Rock customer

See also: 'You're a big bank, but you're in bad shape. With me it's a full time job. Now behave...'

Satisfied Northern Rock customer discussing recent corporate strategy decisions with a Northern Rock board member

etc etc

-

PS Best opening credits to a British film ever?



As always, I am quietly confident that everyone knows the answer to that question

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Stef's Shopping Tips #428

Sainsburys have got both Toblerones and Muller Rice on special at the moment

though I caution against buying both at the same time...



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New Customers Only pt1

One of the personal consequences of the implosion of Northern Rock has been that a couple of pensioners have asked me to look over their savings and other financial arrangements

And even though they smell vaguely of cat food and repeatedly call me by my brother's name they are not yet that far gone to believe a word of what the government, the television or the banking industry is telling them

Apparently, Northern Rock is 'on the mend'...

A personal message from Channel 4's Jon Snow informing me that Northern Rock is 'on the mend'

...which seems to be the new way of saying 'irredeemably fucked'

Personal experience gained from shuffling a few old ladies' savings around this last week, combined with some anecdotal evidence and my patented spooky psychic powers, tells me that, unsurprisingly, there have been some rather chunky, and largely unreported, flows of cash out of and into certain retail savings institutions

My spooky psychic powers are telling me that it's been a splendid week for the likes of building societies such as Nationwide, Britannia and Chelsea (try calling their new account opening phone numbers for a giggle)...

...not such a good week for the likes of banks such as Bradford & Bingley, Alliance & Leicester, HBOS (Halifax) or Barclays (Woolwich), any of which could easily be a lot sicker than we are being led to believe

and no prizes for spotting that my ESP is telling me that it is building societies which are feasting off the wounded flesh of banks which were once themselves building societies

Building societies were never exactly the most brilliantly managed institutions. They do however have several things going for them - especially the fact that building societies don't issue shares and are therefore immune to the kind of exciting stock market shenanigans which result in the bouncy, bouncy price variations that speculators find so rewarding

Maybe I missed it but the acres of media commentary and analysis generated as a result of (ex-building society) Northern Rock's demise somehow failed to touch upon all sorts of pertinent and potentially enlightening lines of thought:

• the near death of building societies ten years ago, when large numbers of 'carpetbaggers' colluded with the banking industry in return for a few hundred poxy quid in windfall shares
  
  
• the negative influence of the stock market on directors, under constant pressure and temptation to increase share prices through adoption of half-arsed, short-sighted business strategies; including ill-advised cost cutting, creative accounting and adoption of insanely risky business models
  
  
• the role of powerful speculators armed with resources capable of distorting shares prices and rigging markets
  
  
• the presence of quite a few people in the queues who appear to have 'saved' an awful lot of cash, or maybe they had piled up their loot off the back of the same lunatic housing bubble that looked liked it was going pop any minute, taking their unearned nest eggs with it - a few vaguely guilty consciences and a subconscious fear of an impending dose of cosmic yin and yang perhaps?
  
  
• the Governor of the Bank of England telling the Treasury Select Committee when he appeared before it last week that, yes, the people pulling their money out of Northern Rock were behaving rationally. Their savings were not safe and would have either been lost or frozen for months if the Bank of England and the Government had not eventually intervened with an explicit guarantee

The BBC's sophisticated analysis of the roots of the Northern Rock crisis

All things considered it was much easier to blame a few thousand 'irrational', poorly informed grannies for the fuck up

The results of a rather dubious on-line poll run by the BBC last week - at least 65.91% of the astroturfers who responded were flat wrong

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Who will save us now?

Tupperware fans around the world will be stunned to discover that New Scotland Yard Anti-Terrorism Superhero DAC Peter Clarke Kent has just announced his retirement…


However, given that Clarke is only a fresh-faced 52 years old, it is likely that his razor sharp intellect and ace anti-terror skillz will be much sought after and put to good use in the private sector

It seems only fair that Peter collects a reward for his part in fighting the Eternal War on Terror

The awesome 'Delta 6250' aka Satan's Lunchbox - (with lid)

Peter has shared much of his wisdom and sage philosophy with us over the years, including this favourite quote which I think encapsulates so much about the way the Eternal War on Terror is being fought on our streets…

"It is no exaggeration to say that at the time of the arrest there was not one shred of admissible evidence against Barot. The arrest was perfectly lawful - there were more than sufficient grounds, but in terms of evidence to put before a court, there was nothing. There then began the race against time to retrieve evidence from the mass of computers and other IT equipment that we seized. It was only at the very end of the permitted period of detention that sufficient evidence was found to justify charges. I know that some in the media were sharpening their pencils, and that if we had been unable to bring charges in that case, there would have been a wave of criticism about the arrests. Barot himself of course eventually pleaded guilty last year and received a 40-year sentence."

Finding a replacement of equal calibre to Peter Clarke is going to be a nigh impossible task but if we want to continue preserving Western Civilisation by handing out life sentences to the mentally ill and people with suspicious kitchenware collections that successor has to be found




As an anonymous commentator opined by way of verse elsewhere…


Lines on the Retirement of DAC Peter Clarke

So. Farewell
Then Deputy Assistant Commissioner Peter Clarke.

You were
In charge of protecting Royalty when
Princess Diana was killed in a car crash in Paris on August 31, 1997.

You were
In charge on July 7, 2005 when
bombs killed 52 people in the rush hour on the public transport system.

You were
In charge on July 22, 2005 when
An innocent Brazilian was killed,
With eleven shots spaced three seconds apart,
He was shot seven times in the back of the head
With bullets that left his face unmarked,
And once in the shoulder. The other three shots missed.

"Not on my watch",
That was your
Catchphrase.

My money
Is on Cressida Dick.

(E.J. Thribb 77 and a half)

-

and whilst on the subject of tWoTs and suspicious things in the kitchen, imagine my slight confusion the other day when browsing the Internet in search of a reasonably priced (i.e. cheap) bottle of plonk to order for someone in New Zealand and coming across this...



"In Australia, cleanskin wine is a term for bottled wine that does not carry a label or any other identifying marks. Cleanskin wines are sold in sealed cartons of six or twelve bottles and the carton must display a label that meets the minimum legal requirements as defined by Australian law.

Cleanskin wines have been sold in Australia since at least the early 1960's but are generally only popular during periods of imbalance in the Australian domestic wine market. Wineries will sell cleanskins to dump excess or unwanted wine stocks and do so to avoid the negative consequences of discounting their existing brands. This form of dumping often has very little to do with the quality of the wine and consumers can benefit greatly however there is always an element of risk when purchasing cleanskins.

In recent times, "cleanskins" have become equated with Australian terroir. Cleanskins are often sold based on region of origin rather than by winemaker or brand. Retailers will charge a premium for certain varietals from certain regions such as Riesling from the Clare Valley or Shiraz from the Barossa Valley"

Faceless Terroir Wine

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Sorry I Confused You

And the prize for the most astonishing blog post I've read for a long time goes to Dilbert creator Scott Adam's piece entitled...

A feeling I'm being had

That would be the post that starts with...

"I was happy to hear that NYC didn't allow Iranian President Ahmadinejad to place a wreath at the WTC site. And I was happy that Columbia University is rescinding the offer to let him speak. If you let a guy like that express his views, before long the entire world will want freedom of speech."

and ends with...

"If Ahmadinejad thinks he can be our friend by honoring our heroes and opening a dialog, he underestimates our ability to misinterpret him. Fucking idiot. I hate him."


Whoever said that Americans can't do sarcasm?





See also Scott's follow up post, written in response to the enthusiastic reception given to 'A feeling I'm being had', entitled...

Sorry I confused you

Which would be the post that starts...

"In reading the comments to my post yesterday, I see that many of you were confused about my positions. Evidently all of you are brilliant, so I assume the problem is on my end. With your indulgence, allow me to clarify.

1. I am not happy that Hitler killed your relatives..."


Utterly gobsmacking

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Public Service Announcement

"He's big! He's round! He's worth a billion pounds!"

"... He's also dreadfully litigious!"

Someone just sent me a link to a post in Chicken Yoghurt's blog...

Public Service Announcement
Thursday September 20 2007 at 4:42 pm

Tim Ireland’s Bloggerheads site is currently down after his webhost pulled the plug. You can thank the latest Russian (that should be Uzbek) billionaire to reach the UK.

Tim’s currently also without email so if anyone needs to get hold of him, I’m happy to be the go-between and pass on any message by phone. My email address is at the top of the page.

This also means that the family of websites that Tim and Clive (whose site is also down) look after are also currently AWOL. So if you’re missing the online presences of Craig Murray, Bob Piper or Boris Johnson, now you know why they’ve gone.

Tim and Clive are now looking for a new web home from themselves and the rest and are hoping to be back within 48 hours. If any sympathetic souls would help spread the word, it would be most appreciated.

and, yes, the blogs in question do appear to be unavailable

Yet more proof, if ever it were needed, that we in the UK are gifted with the finest legal system that money can buy

Given that this situation appears to involve banning of blog sites and the British establishment's ongoing policy of kissing oligarch arse, two subjects dear to my heart, I should be joining in with others screaming from the rooftops about this

and I probably will

However, there is a certain degree of irony involved as at least one of the bloggers caught up in this has been involved in one or two unsound campaigns (imho) against blogs he doesn't like himself. On top of that, several of the blogs coming out against what has happened over the last couple of days have also been prone to heaping abuse on we Conspiraloons in the past and, presumably, the present - though I'm not sure as I stopped reading them some time ago

Personally, I'm all for finding common cause with decent people unhappy about the direction our lives are being pushed towards, even if they hold some beliefs that I believe to be misguided - and that includes people of religious, political or scientific faith. Divide and rule is a tactic of the powerful and I for one try very, very hard not to be suckered into that game

"Can't you see the difference between us?! He's Black on his LEFT side!! ...and he's got a bigger thingie!!"

So, yes, the latest act of censorship stinks and needs to be publicised and acted against. It would just be nice if some of the people caught up in it weren't in the habit of accusing my conspirabuddies who have issues with the 'Official Narrative' of 7/7 of being insane c*nts

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edit: Lord Patel has more here

edit #2: Tim Worstall has compiled a list of bloggers who have commented on and criticised the actions of a certain Uzbek tyrant billionaire, and his outstanding contributions to the cause of free speech in the UK, here

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Fool me once...

Thanks to LWTC247 for pointing me towards the latest incarnation of Northern Rock’s Homepage which is now given over entirely to a personal statement from Northern Rock’s CEO Adam J. Appletise.

As well as doing a very passable impression of the Evil Hood from Thunderbirds in the accompanying portrait, Adam also includes this outstandingly generous offer to people who have withdrawn money from Northern Rock over the last few days…

Northern Rock CEO - Adam J. Appletise

“I am also pleased to announce that any customer who has paid a penalty for withdrawing their investment, will have the penalty refunded if they re-invest the same amount in the same type of account by 5th October 2007.”


…but presumably only if the customers bend over, grab their ankles and ask nicely first

Carlo Ponzi would be well-impressed

Chancellor of the Exchequer - Alastair Darling

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Another site worth a quick browse in these difficult times is the Have Your Say page on the BBC site devoted to the question…

Will Fed rate cut boost the US economy?

…which is in the process of being cut off from the rest of the BBC site and completely overrun by Conspiraloons™ posting about the evils of the Federal Reserve, credit based money systems and being rogered senseless by bankers generally

As I type, the most recent post includes a personal favourite quote from a former director of the Bank of England Josiah Stamp

Former BoE director Josiah Stamp - a man with no known Thunderbirds look-alikes

"Banking was conceived in iniquity and was born in sin. The bankers own the earth. Take it away from them, but leave them the power to create money, and with the flick of the pen they will create enough deposits to buy it back again. However, take it away from them, and all the great fortunes like mine will disappear and they ought to disappear, for this would be a happier and better world to live in. But, if you wish to remain the slaves of bankers and pay the cost of your own slavery, let them continue to create money ."

Marvellous, marvellous stuff

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Rational decision making

It's fairly clear that the likes of the BBC and Sky have been told to 'cool it' today.

And the No.1 reason being given why people should leave their life savings in a mortally wounded bank that's managed by gibbons, when there are dozens of other deposit taking institutions often located next door to Northern Rock branches more than happy to take the money at comparable interest rates, is?

"It saves queuing outside in the rain"

I've got some news for the BBC and Sky...




It's not actually raining

and, apparently, there aren't any queues

On the other hand if Northern Rock depositors decide to stroll into their local branches in the blazing sunshine to transfer their life savings into a bank that isn't terminally fucked they won't be able to watch television and lap up all those fascinating stories about the McCanns and Foot and Mouth that are creeping back onto our screens

Hmmm, tricky choice

-

edit:

Some of the comments underneath this post include reference to coverage of the McCann story and the involvement of alleged master of the Media Dark Arts, Clarence Mitchell...

Hmmm, just like the real thing

which reminded me of a curious wee interview given by the BBC to one of the people queuing outside Northern Rock's Golders Green branch earlier today

Not only was he about a third the age of your typical Northern Rock conspiraloon depositor he also explained in fairly eloquent terms that...

• he was only queuing up to withdraw some money from Northern Rock so that he could buy shares in Northern Rock which were now a bargain price

• he was going to leave the rest of his money in Northern Rock because it was just as safe there as anywhere else, probably safer

• everything, in fact, was just fucking peachy

...as Northern Rock customers waiting outside one of its braches go, a dream come true for both the bank and the government

Isn't it great when dreams come true

It was all a bit thick really and the Beeb wisely skipped repeating the interview in tonight's 10 o'clock bulletin

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They're all Conspiraloons™ now - pt2

Channel 4 News tonight included an interview with a psychologist as part of its coverage of the run on Northern Rock. The message?

People who have been queuing to take their money out of Northern Rock are mental

Typical Northern Rock depositor

They're also a little bit thick and failed to comprehend the guarantees (sic.) made by the Bank of England, The FSA and the Government on Friday and over the weekend

Another...

Hmmmm...

this is an interesting line to take, given that those people were taking money out of a bank that had been rendered insolvent by management incompetence and were preferring instead to deposit their savings with one of the plethora of alternative financial institutions that have so far not imploded themselves to such a state that no other bank would touch them with a bargepole

Yup, totally bonkers

And as an unrepetent and proud member of the Conspiraloon™ Alliance, the sight of large numbers of people sick to death of being lied to, reacting against the establishment and being branded by the mainstream media as nutters for their pains pleasures me immensely

I love it

More please

-

It's also worth noting that, as with the fuel protests seven years ago, this 'direct action' taken by a few thousand angry members of the public has clearly shat our establishment up more than a couple of million people marching against the invasion of Iraq ever did

If you know where to poke it, The Beast is weak...

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Who F**ks you Xtra? oooh oooh

...taken back in the days when wearing a straw boater was a mandatory requirement for anyone attending a bank run

Now that Northern Rock is as good as finished and just waiting for someone to have the decency to administer the coup de grâce it's only reasonable to ask 'who's next?'

Fish of the Week

Because they pursued a similar business strategy to Northern Rock, the two most popular names in the frame seem to be Bradford & Bingley and Alliance & Leicester. Like Northern Rock, they have given out mortgages far in excess of deposits taken and have had to fund their business from money borrowed from other banks. The problem being that other banks have a fair idea of how shite many of those mortgages are and are not lending the funds required.

Or so the story goes

Personally, I haven't looked over B&B or A&L's books so I don't know how dire their predicament really is

But it doesn't really matter

As long as people think those banks are in bad shape they are in bad shape

There are predators out there who have seen how panicky depositors are and how quickly a little negative publicity has crushed a bank's reputation and its share price. The stockmarket is more than ready for a little predatory shorting of financial stocks

All you have to do is...

• Sell a lot of Bradford and Bingley shares you don't actually own at the current market price, say £3.60, with a promise to deliver the shares to the buyer in a few days time

• Hope that other speculators and nervous investors join in the sale-fest and drive the market price down to say something like £2.00 a share
  

• At which point you buy the shares you 'sold' a few days before and turn them over to whoever bought them off you.

• Bingo, you've made £1.60 a share selling stuff you didn't own, off the back of a panic you could very well have started

• And just to be on the safe side and to make sure the share price doesn't rise instead of fall, there's no harm is spreading a few malicious rumours about the company you are mucking about with - there's nothing like TV coverage of mobs of terrified grannies clawing at a bank's front doors to really enhance its share price
  

Of course, if the company you're mucking about with is inherently strong and market sentiment is generally positive, playing this sort of game is a risky business.

Though, to be honest, if I were a c*nt in a stripy shirt and access to a trading screen right now I'd be sitting here with an erection, thinking 'dead cert'...

(The Daily Mash)

It's also worth pondering upon the fact that the people who ultimately stand to lose out from all of this are ordinary savers and people with pensions. That's the not so funny thing about credit bubbles and their aftermath, everyone loses - savers and spenders alike. At least the spenders got to buy some rubbish and have some nice holidays for a while

Of course, things will start to get really interesting if and when house prices start to fall as the result of lenders like Northern Rock, Alliance & Leicester, Bradford & Bingley, and all the others, pumping less money into the housing market with their shonky, fucked-up mortgages

and then, all that debt which built-up off the back of elevated house prices will become flakier and flakier

and then...

well, fuck knows




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edit:

There's an intriguing little quote from BBC Business Editor Robert Peston on the BBC News site here...

"Mortgage banks and building societies such as Alliance & Leicester and Bradford & Bingley, as well as the bigger banks, have seen much of the money withdrawn from Northern Rock"

Now why would Mr Peston single out A&L and B&B, out of all the players on the field, as being destinations for savers fleeing Northern Rock ? = An implied endorsement of those two banks by the State Broadcasting Company

Could someone else be worried that the knives will be out for those two institutions this week?

Total LoonThink™, obviously

And remember, it's only subliminal if you don't notice

edit #2:

At the close of today's working day it seems that Alliance & Leicester was selected as next in line for a well-deserved and potentially lucrative kicking on the stock market, though Bradford & Bingley hardly had a fun day either

And then at the end of all that...

The government announced that it was guaranteeing Northern Rock depositors' money

WTF!?

as outrageous an example of corporate welfare as you're ever likely to see

Apparently, UK taxpayers are now in the 'underwriting shitty loans made by private companies' business

What's our fee for doing that I wonder

Though this might stabilise the share price of banks which have specialised in shitty loans for a little while, it is unlikely that they will be able to continue pumping money into and inflating the housing market with their shitty loans. And it will be interesting to see just how large an appetite our government has for supporting shitty loans on our behalf in the days and weeks ahead. Rumour has it that there are one or two shitty loans out there

It would be nice to think that speculators who have shorted NR, A&L and B&B in the expectation of a share price bloodbath have been reamed by the government announcement and the positive impact it may have on share prices. However, the week is still young and I suspect much tomfoolery lies ahead...

.

Monkey Dust

One of the following videos is taken from the best and, as is increasingly turning out, the most prophetic British cartoon show ever made, Monkey Dust. The other isn't...





You Tube is crammed full of clips from Monkey Dust - it's all good

And it will be a cold day in Hell before the BBC releases Series Two or Three of MD on DVD or commissions a fourth. Way too near the mark...

Thanks to anon and Lord P. for the links

-

edit: and if you want to see something really scary you could do a lot worse than checking out this passionate appeal on the subject of lost children from US First Lady Laura Bush ('embedding disabled by request'). No rapid blinking or fidgety gestures from Laura - disturbingly so. Watching stuff like this can really bring out the David Icke in a person

.

It begins?

A few expressions and concepts that might be worth brushing up on over the next few days now that Northern Rock can't lend money it doesn't have any more and is begging for a bail out...

• 'Bank Run'

• 'Fractional-Reserve Banking'

• 'Credit-based monetary systems'

• 'Ponzi Schemes'

An artist's impression of the scene outside a typical Northern Rock branch this morning

I'm having real trouble coming up with any wise-arse comments about Northern Rock and the significance of its predicament. The kind of fuck-ups that might be just around the corner really aren't very funny at all

Not one little bit


edit: The Daily Mash is having a stab at wise-arse comments though...

CHRISTIANS PREPARE FOR RAPTURE AS HOUSE PRICES DIP

That's the differences between us amateurs and the pros I guess


edit#2: I wish I'd thought about pasting this into my blog first...



.

Apophenia (redux)

A commentator (Merkin) on my previous post asks...

Am I really ill?
That graphic of the exclusion zones showed a prick and ball in the middle.




The answer is, I think, no

I don't think that Apophenia, the experience of seeing patterns or connections in random or meaningless data, can be considered an illness as such. After all, who's to say that the data, certainly without further investigation, really is random or meaningless?

Take the work of twisted, and unfortunately psychotic, genius Luke Halder for example. He really was trying to paint a smiley face across America with pipe bombs...




...and if you had been an FBI agent clever enough to spot what Luke was up to you would have won a prize and not been considered mental at all

(PS you can track Lucas' whereabouts with the useful, if slightly disturbing, Federal Bureau of Prisons - 'Find an Inmate' service)

And returning to the example of DEFRA FMV Protection Zones, I too must confess that I was reminded of a picture of Michelin Man that adorned the common room in my old geology department which had been 'enhanced' by a bored Earth Sciences student armed with a bottle of Tippex...




Phallophenia?

.

Moooooo!!

Lord Patel has written a couple of posts about the latest foot and mouth outbreak here and here.

He was particularly interested by the fact that the new F&M ‘Protection Zone’ includes yet another fricking government bio-war facility. This time the Veterinary Laboratories Agency (VLA) in Woodham

To be honest I was a little confused with Lord Patel’s posts at first, as the VLA is actually 8km from the reported outbreak site and therefore falls well outside the 3km Protection Zone that was first announced by DEFRA at 11 o’clock yesterday morning




However, later in the day at 5 o’clock DEFRA updated its list of Protection Zones on the basis that

‘On 12 September Foot and Mouth Disease was confirmed at a farm in Surrey. The farm comprises a number of separate parcels of land: a single Protection Zone has been put in place extending 3 kilometres around each of them, with a Surveillance Zone of 10 kilometres radius beyond that. Footpaths are being closed in the Protection Zone. Cattle on the affected farm are being culled, together with animals on an adjacent farm.’

And the VLA falls well within the expanded area under protection...




The VLA and the latest outbreak site both also handily happen to be located comfortably within a cow's coughing distance from the M25

Bless, the Americans test and hold all their noxious shit in the middle of deserts or Alabama but the British like to play with their anthrax in facilities with shit plumbing located right next to their capital city's orbital motorway and, yes I'm looking at the map, a small river. Outstanding

Curiously, the Institute for Animal Health (IAH) – the source of August’s F&M outbreak only falls within a ‘Surveillence Zone’

I mention all this because, as I’ve already commented to people elsewhere, I was more than a little underwhelmed by the reception given to the HSE report on the August outbreak which concluded that the outbreak was probably due to leaky drains (!?)

More specifically we were told that this was the probable chain of events...

• Three organisations operate at Pirbright - Institute for Animal Health, Merial Animal Health and Stabilitech

• All three work with live virus strain O1BFS that caused foot-and-mouth disease but origin of leaked virus not known

• Waste water containing live virus entered drainage pipework

• Contaminated waste may have leaked into soil from unsealed manholes and pipes damaged by tree roots

• Heavy rainfall in late July may have led to further leaks from drains

• Contractors and their vehicles had relatively unrestricted access to Pirbright - a breach of biosecurity

• Construction work disturbed soil above drainage system

• Lorries probably picked up virus on tyres and underbodies, carried it away from site and past Woolford Farm

• Cattle at the farm tested positive for foot-and-mouth on 3rd August

Fans of the fabulously elaborate death scenes in movies such as The Omen and the Final Destination series will no doubt be perfectly at ease with this explanation

"A tragic accident that was just waiting to happen" - The HSE

but nevertheless I couldn’t help but be struck by how blasé the mainstream media seemed to be about the whole business

And presumably the explanation for the latest outbreak is going to have to be even more long-winded and append a couple of extra steps that explain how a virus with an incubation period of 2-14 days can lie low for 30+ days before saying hello to everyone again

Oh dear

Conspiraloons™ are particularly touchy about our government’s new found love for mutant killer viruses, both real and imagined, because we’re just a teensy wee bit suspicious that naughty people might, hypothetically speaking of course, feel just a little tempted to whistle up some viruses, real or imagined, as a means of making shit loads of money from the bullshit vaccine business and as a handy tool to close down entire swathes of the country at the drop of hat, as and when it suits their purposes, no real questions asked

Totally bonkers of course but we do, sadly, live in cynical times

Now would definitely be a good time for those lovable prankmonkeys the McCann's to do something amusing methinks... .


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Conspiratune™ of the Week: Bin Laden Didn't Blow Up The Projects

Alternate, more texty, video available here

Oooh, I think I need a lie down now...

(Thanks for the link Gary)

-

edit: and whilst I'm linking to Conspiratunes™ I 've just realised that I haven't posted a relink to Rammstein's Amerika for at least a month now. Shame on me...

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P20

The all-new 2007 edition Renault McCann - complete with plenty of boot space (family-sized bottles of Dettol and wet wipes available as optional extras)

(Thanks to anon for the link to the following left by way of a comment underneath my previous post)


I'm reproducing a comment left by 'P20' in a thread discussing the Madeleine McCann saga on the Daily Mirror's online forum. Whilst I don't necessarily buy into everything P20 is suggesting in the post, she/he raises some interesting ideas that I think are worth mulling over (even if it could do with translation in some places)...




(NB! 'Keyboard Monkey' = someone paid to make posts on the Internet whilst posing as a member of the general public)


"Guess you're ready at this point to consider that this entire charade has been an experiment, an elaborate, scripted hoax, to assess the effectiveness of combined Keyboard Monkeys and Pimp media, in assaults against the public ?

Clarrie would have been very eager to learn how many of the Ones in Twenty frequent forums. If you're not familiar with the 'Ones in 20' --- briefly, it's been estimated that on average, out of every twenty people, one will be a natural leader, able to motivate the rest. In wartime, the Ones in Twenty were removed in the belief the remaining 19 would thus be rendered obedient and easy to handle.

It's easy to pick the I in 20 out of a crowd. That's why they film protest marches, etc. A good 1 in 20 can rouse and lead a nation. Ones in Twenty are the natural enemies of governments, repressive governments especially.

Internet has changed everything. Governments fear it. But now they're being told they can use internet to their advantage. Which is where media monitoring units and the Hobshawns of the world come in. They're selling a product to governments with promises of being able to control societies remotely, using 'opinion shapers' and the like online.

I think this hoax/experiment will have scared the wits out of politicians. Because I suspect that instead of discovering perhaps Ones in Twenty in forums, they've discovered the ratio to be closer to 5 in 20, possibly 8 in 20.

What Clarrie and the s.c.u.m. have learned is that Ones in Twenty gravitate to internet forums. They teach the rest how to navigate and dissect media spin until it becomes automatic to all. Internet forums create Ones in Twenty ! And everyone develops new and vital skills via exposure to them.

Look at this forum, for example. The media c.r.a.p. doesn't have a chance here ! Yes, it's still fooling Mr. and Mrs Average who rely on Sky and Daily Mail for the news. But that same media garbage is ripped apart in these forums as fast as the media pimps can spin it. That is NOT good news for Hobshawn or Gordie or the media monitoring industry.

They've learned also that Keyboard Monkeys are worse than useless. Duh, Clarrie ... as I've told you before --- pay peanuts and monkeys is all you'll get.

At this point, the Clarries and Hobshawns of the world might be realising that for 'opinion shaping and steering' to work effectively, you need to have a superior class of Keyboard Monkey. They need to be trained. That costs money. Up goes the price of the product the Hobshawn's are trying to sell. And it gets worse (if you're a Hobshawn) or better, if you're a One or More in Twenty. Because having expended all that money, time and effort training Keyboard Monkeys, you have to keep them long enough to recoup your outlay and then some. We can see Keyboard Monkeys being head-hunted, can't we ? A new growth industry, with spin-offs such as Keyboard Monkey Training Centres. Advanced Keyboard Monkey Degrees. Phd in Monkeying. etc.

The phase I'm personally looking forward to, is the Keyboard Monkeys' Revolt. After all, like professional debaters, highly trained Keyboard Monkeys will automatically become ambivalent regarding any subject. Flexibility would be their tool. On any given day, they might be required to 'persuade' people to endorse mandatory euthanasia and to drink toxic recycled water. Who would blame them if, for the hell of it, or to pay back a despised employer or in a fit of conscience ......... the Keyboard Monkeys Crossed to the Other Side Twisted Evil

Or ........ maybe people like ourselves would accept Keyboard Monkey positions in order to sabotage our employer, especially in political matters. How would those employers know ? In order to control their Keyboard Monkeys, they'd have to pay people to monitor those Monkeys. And it's possible the monitors might have a few political or other agenda of their own.

In the end, organisations and governments will realise it's more costly and problematic to try to shape societies via online Monkeys than it to just leave the public alone. And the Hobshawns will have to find another middle-man role as a means of earning their living.

Right now, it's very possible that this entire McTan Scam is an experiment, a scripted hoax, right down to PJ searches and Portuguese media reports. The McTans may be MI5/6. They have that look to them. Madeleine may be no more than a photograph borrowed for the experiment/hoax -- with the Clarrie's of the world timing just how long each new item of media spin lasts in the cauldron that is this and other online forums. They may well be testing us, to see how swiftly and how much of this case we 'crack', as the raw data is fed to us by the pimp media. They need this information, for future reference. Because they've got lots of scams on the drawing boards with a lot more at stake that a couple of robotic actors and a million pound Fund.

They've learned a lot from this forum (and others of course). They are collating data. They now know (thanks to this and other forums) just how great a role intuition plays in the public's determination of what is and what is not 'believable'.

They've learned the importance of 'sympathetic personalities', because by now, they realise that people first began to suspect Kat and Jerry because of their 'detached' and 'unemotional' demeanor.

They've learned that WE learn fast. We might be fooled by something once, but not twice.

They've learned we're far more analytical than they would ever have expected.

They've learned that total strangers, sight unseen, from all corners of the globe, regardless of class, education, age, etc. are immediately accepting of each other and willing to share information and work co-operatively regarding complex topics, amid hundreds of details.

We have shocked the living sh*t out of them. Now let's give them a collective Big Middle Finger ! Hi Clarrie. We see you ! One word for you luvvie --- it's backfiring. And so are Gordie's chances of winning the election ! Ciao"

.

They're all Conspiraloons now - well, sort of

Many of the most vehement criticisms of parapolitical conspiracy theories come not from the 'Right' of politics but from established 'Left Wing' thinkers and writers

Which is kind of curious really

You would have thought that supposedly anti-establishment lefties would be all over a worldview that saw the human affairs as being consciously manipulated by a powerful, self-serving elite

The sticking point is not the concept of a powerful, self-serving elite but the suggestion that the members of this elite are going about their self-serving in a deliberate, co-ordinated manner...

• Conspiraloons™ believe that much of what goes on in the world is deliberately planned, or at least given a good nudge wherever possible

• Serious Left Wing intellectuals know that these things 'just happen'

This distinction goes back at least as far as the 19th Century, when thinkers like Marx and Darwin attempted to explain everything in terms of scientific forces rather than the acts of individuals, which smacked too much of religion for their tastes.

Believing that things just happen was claimed to be rational and scientific. Believing that things are sometimes deliberately made to happen by powerful forces which don't always announce what they're up to was denounced as irrational and superstitious

There has been much discussion amongst Conspiraloons™ that the powerful forces which control the world invested heavily in promoting this arbitrary and essentially false dichotomy and that the greatest trick they ever pulled was convincing the world they didn't exist

but that's not important or particularly amusing right now

What is amusing right now are the signs of discomfort being shown by journalistic gatekeepers (arguably prisoners of ideology rather than conscious shills) as they try to explain and comment on what's going on in the world without committing the mortal sin of sounding like a Conspiraloon™. Thanks to the Internet and the increasingly blatant behaviour of our non-existent controlling elites, that's proving to be an increasingly difficult act to pull off

Some evidence to illustrate what I'm talking about taken from a couple of very peculiar journalistic days at the end of last month ('borrowing' very heavily from original research carried out by a charter member of the Conspiraloon™ Alliance here and here)...


Exhibit A

Robert Fisk - the journalist who despises the Internet

Even I Question the truth about 9/11 (The Independent 25/8/07)

In which Fisk rattles off a laundry list of unanswered questions about 9/11 and inconsistencies in the official narrative

At the end of which he concludes...

Let me repeat. I am not a conspiracy theorist. Spare me the ravers. Spare me the plots. But like everyone else, I would like to know the full story of 9/11, not least because it was the trigger for the whole lunatic, meretricious "war on terror" which has led us to disaster in Iraq and Afghanistan and in much of the Middle East.

Yup, Bob airs a list of questions, the very existence of which challenge what we have been told about 9/11, but he's NOT a conspiracy theorist

Knob


Exhibit B

Will Hutton

Curb the Greedy Financiers (The Guardian 26/8/07)

Good Will Hutton has penned a piece that will gladden the heart of conspiracy connoisseurs everywhere. He points out that:

Globalisation, it is now clear, is run in the interests of a global financial class which has Western governments in its thrall

more:

The rules of the game are set up solely to benefit the financiers whether in London, New York or Hong Kong

furthermore:

It is as though Europe and America had announced an amnesty to the world's criminal gangs after they had gone on a killing spree because they feared the killing would get worse

and even furthermore:

We need a party which will speak for an interest other than self-interested, amoral plutocrats. None exists

Make no mistake, this is Loontalk™ in all but name...


Exhibit C (my extra special favourite)

George Monbiot

How the neoliberals stitched up the wealth of nations for themselves (The Guardian 28/8/07)

A cabal of intellectuals and elitists hijacked the economic debate, and now we are dealing with the catastrophic effects

How did they start? A tale all too familiar to us....

They arise in large part from a meeting that took place 60 years ago in a Swiss spa resort

To what purpose George, to what purpose?!!!

the real intent of the programme - the restoration of the power of the elite

What happens if you cross this cabal?!!?

if you disagreed, you got shot

Coming from anyone else, this could easily be dismissed as conspiracy theory, but it can't be, because George has previously come out strongly against these things.

Clearly this man has come a long way in a short time, he is one of us now, and we must cherish him. As one disciple of the David Shayler Being's previous life said:

"I tell you, there will be more joy in Conspiracy Heaven over one reporter who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance."


Maybe now's the time to start thinking about initiating a program of militant Conspiraloon™ activism - holding Conspiraloon™ Pride carnivals, writing protest songs, printing up some T shirts and aggressively 'outing' all those closet loons out there. They'd feel so much better about themselves afterwards

.

Giving up Liberty for Freedom - the Youtube critics rave...

“she's talking bullshit..this is the "whitby" version... geezer was sitting down,reading the metro paper.. out of date visa?..so what?.. . this all started wierd anyway... surveillance taking a piss when he walked out of his flats?..didnt get a good look at him?..then lets him on the bus?..failed bus bomb the day before?..wierd..”

“He wasn't IN his own country woman, it had nothing to do with a visa and eveything to do with racism, and the guy only ran when the tube came in so he catch it. He didn't run.”

“the ignorance behind those smiles.. if it was her son who was shot 8 times for no reason whatsoever shed be whistling a totally different tune. fact is in this age of "terror" a man was shot dead on the basis of his appearance. the met police are bastards”

“You stupid blond fucking cockney slutbag dirty chavvy whore, I really hope you get shot or one of your kids do, tell me how much did the pigs give you to say that shit?”

“Disgusting.”

“LOL, what a fucking ugly brain dead crack whore. God i hope that bitch stumbles upon this. She's probably already seen Terror storm because she's in it, lol.”

“i think even if it was her son she still would've been on the side of the police.........f*kin b*tch”

“Does this dumb bitch realize that liberty is freedom? God...this world is fucked.”

.

Burying Bad News (again)

Whilst pondering upon the possible wider implications of the Find Madeleine campaign/ psyop(?) I flicked through some of the other news stories from the end of last week that were eclipsed by the latest upsurge in McCann mania.

Ever since Jo Moore got busted I think it’s pretty difficult for even the most hardened ‘realist’ (sic.) to continue pretending that there aren’t amoral psychopaths working for our establishment who have absolutely no problems with ‘burying’ bad news stories by synchronising their disclosure to coincide with more sensational, populist stories.

In fact, I’d argue that times when sensationalist stories like the McCann saga are being plastered all over the media are precisely the times to be most alert and on the look out for more significant, ‘buried’ bad news stories.

After all, shouldn’t a little bit more have been of the announcement that the recent Foot and Mouth outbreak in the UK was the result, allegedly, of dodgy drains?

How exactly does Foot and Mouth make its way out of a dodgy drain and, as I understand, move uphill to nearby farms? What exactly are highly-trained scientists doing pouring F&M down a leaky drain in the first place? Why is the facility in question still in operation? What is the state of repair of other similar facilities? WTF is going on?

Or how about the news that the government has once again rejected holding an inquiry into the 7/7 bombings?

…another story that received barely a mention whilst everyone was wetting themselves in their eagerness to cover the McCann thing

"Say, that's a nice van..."

"The government remains of the opinion that a public inquiry is not necessary. We are making no further comment as legal proceedings are ongoing."


I’ve read quite a few comments from people on blogs and newspaper comment sections that support the government in not holding a public inquiry. The gist of the argument against an inquiry is summed up in a couple of comments I saw under a post in Elmer Q. Gooseburger’s blog…


“Excellent news, Mr. Gooseburger, our security officers have much better things to do with their time than fannying around at the behest of a bunch of politically-inspired self-publicists... Even as I write, I do not doubt that there are several intricate and potentially dangerous operations in progress which require their full-time application. I want them at work, not stuck in some court-room answering questions raised with the perfect 20/20 vision of hind-sight.”

“Exactly, so, Mr. Gooseburger. I suspect that one or two mistakes might have been made prior to the 7/7 bombings. I am equally sure that lessons have been learned by the officers concerned and as there has never been a war fought without SNAFUs, I don't expect that this one will break the mould, particularly as it is likely to rage for a generation or two.”


There are, or course, one or two small problem-ettes with this line of reasoning

The first being that for reasons that should be blindingly fucking obvious there is was a well-established tradition in the UK that when something horrible happens to people an investigation is carried out virtually as a matter of course.

The investigation can take any of several forms – a trial, an inquest or an inquiry by a regulatory body.

And the results are published

I have no doubt, for example, that the criminally negligent rail operators in this country would love to claim every time they accidentally slaughter a few dozen of their passengers that all necessary lessons have been learned and that external inquiries would simply hamper the process of acting on those lessons

But that would be bollocks

An awful lot of people died on 7/7 and the 'Official Narrative' of the events of that day is being used to justify fundamental changes in the way of life of this country. All without any due process or rigour being exercised on that Official Narrative.

Now if the politicians and senior security officers involved in peddling that Official Narrative had an unblemished track record for honesty I’d kind of understand, but not agree with, those people who are arguing that an inquiry would be a distraction

But there is no such track record

Cut Out and Keep DIY Debating Aid for use when spinning against Conspiraloons™ who express scepticism about the Official 7/7 Narrative - courtesy of The Conspiraloon™ Alliance

And waiting until after a war has been fucked-up to investigate the whos, hows and whys of that war is daft.

The best historical parallel I can think of is the Norway Debate of 1940. The British had just fucked-up a military operation in Norway. Quite badly. The Germans were doing rather well and poised to crush the French. None of which stopped the British Parliament tearing the existing government a new arsehole and ultimately forcing a change in leadership and strategy.

Those were the days

Or maybe the people who think that inquiries during 'wartime' are counter-productive reckon this country would have fared better in WW2 if Neville Chamberlain had stayed in charge?

Neville Chamberlain - famously crap

Aside from all that, and this is admittedly a secondary point, it’s kind of hard to swallow the idea that our senior police officers are so stretched fighting the War on Terror!! that they can’t devote some of their time to be subject to the ‘eternal vigilance’ that some of us are lunatic enough to still believe is the price of freedom.

Take Assistant Commissioner Andy ‘Whoops, I’ve just been caught lying through my fucking teeth about the public execution of an innocent man’ Hayman CBE (awarded 2006) for example

If he’s so fucking pushed that he can’t take part in an inquiry into 7/7 then what’s he doing speaking at privately-organised bollocks War on Terror conferences like this old toss later this month?

He can’t be that busy can he?

Junket superstar and (alleged) fibber par excellence, Assistant Commissioner Andy Hayman wins a prize... oooooh, shiny

-

edit - I should point out that the 'Understanding Terrorism in the UK' conference featuring Andrew Hayman CBE (Confirmed Brazilian Execution) I link to above has recently been canceled due to 'appalling apathy'...

John Casson organiser of the Conference is preparing a report for Prime Minister Gordon Brown, David Cameron, leader of the opposition and the Association of Chief Police Officers which will be made available to them and the press on Thursday 6th September 2007. The purpose of the report is to alert them to the apathy.

No doubt Assistant Commissioner Hayman will now be able to devote the time that has been freed up to hunt down even more crazed jihadists than his important engagement at this crucially important conference would otherwise have permitted him to.

.

New Fish in Town

And the 2007 ‘Don’t Look Now’ award for the most subliminally disturbing advert for photographic equipment goes to…

The Panasonic TZ3 Compact Digital Camera

I saw this in a Dixons duty free catalogue a few weeks ago and unsettling images of scary laughing tranvestite(?) crones with wrinkly arms and over-sized heads have been creeping into my dreams ever since



Thank you Panasonic

-

And whilst on the subject of images suitable for inclusion in altered states of consciousness, I am sad to announce that The Blobfish’s tenure as Fish of the Month has come to an end.

I am, however, delighted to announce the unveiling of a new Fish of the Month...

The Longhorn Cowfish

It’s got horns. It’s bright yellow




.

How does your Osama stay so young looking?

Great minds do indeed think alike, and thanks to The Antagonist for saving me the bother of having to do my own version of this (I've been thinking about doing one all day)...




This, of course, is not the first OBL celebrity product endorsement. As early as 2001 Osama was extolling the virtues of Weight Gain 4000 - a revolutionary new diet supplement that enabled him to put on 100 pounds, change skin colour and nose-shape before recording his all-important 'Confessions of a 9/11 Supervillain' video...


(And whilst on the subject of OBL and 9/11 I've just had a quick peek at the FBI Most Wanted page and it still doesn't mention that OBL is wanted in connection with 9/11. Hmm, molto curioso...)


and remember, everything posted on the Internet is bollocks, except for shonky old videos of dead or fictitious Blofeld-style terrorist masterminds hosted on Virginia-based urls which are always 100% True™


cf. Al Qaeda to Rebrand as 'Scimitar 3000'

"Scimitar 3000 is clean and stylish with a high recognition factor. It focus-grouped incredibly well in Peshawar"

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Available now from my local Tescos...

The Ramadan Chocolate Countdown Calendar...


Only £2.49 - even The Prophet, Peace be Upon Him, would admit that's a bit of a bargain

"Look Mummy! The chocolate's brown - just like us!"

and it's reassuringly 'Nut Free'...


Anyone who knows me will appreciate that I'm posting this simply because I think the juxtaposition of rampant supermarket-style consumerism and Islam is funny, and not as a prelude to some kind of bogus rant about how 'They' are taking over 'Our' country.

As I've said before, if and when I start seeing a substantial number of Muslims running our banks, controlling our newspapers or funding our major political parties I might start doing that. In the meantime, people will have to continue visiting Melanie Phillips' blog for those kind of even-handed, completely agenda-free, adventures in race hate and hysterical demands for Final Solutions to the 'Muslim Problem'.


cf. They Walk Amongst Us courtesy of the Conspiraloon Alliance...

+

=

Sometimes I wish someone would pin Ms Phillips down on the kind of national forum she is given copious access to and point out that the vast majority of Muslims in this country have not been calling for the destruction or subjugation of the British way of life, culture or identity - Christmas decorations included.

Nope, just about the only thing the majority of British Muslims have been pleading for is an end to that fucking war. Mind you, there probably isn't any point. Mel's not stupid, so she must know that she's shoveling shit...

.

Does anybody know WTF this is really all about?

Holiday time, of course, runs at a different rate to normal time and it’s easy to return after a trip with a subconscious expectation that things will have moved on a lot more than they have

After a couple of weeks away from the UK and UK news it was kind of depressing to come home and see this story still plastered all over the newspapers…



It’s all a bloody game isn’t it?

Without attempting to trivialise the probable death of a small child there's something much more peculiar going on here

An awful lot of time and space has been devoted in the media and blogs to the ins and outs of what may have happened the night Madeleine McCann disappeared and the behaviour of her parents

courtesy of El Antagonista

A much, much smaller amount of time has been devoted to trying to understand the forces and objectives behind the enormously overblown and seemingly irrational Find Madeleine campaign – the fund raising, the professional spokespeople, the ribbons, the balloons, the limited companies, the gushing and perplexingly uncritical media coverage, the corporate tie-ins, the spooky government involvement, the Pope…




This is an astonishingly well-resourced, well-supported, well-managed, cross-media campaign. A campaign that has attempted, sometimes successfully, to generate low-level mass hysteria in certain target groups in the population




Just one small question...

Why?

It’s not about finding a lost kid is it?

.