Friday, February 01, 2008

What's a Creationist's Favourite Sandwich?

The mysterious origins of Life - as illustrated by a large banana smeared with warm, dripping peanut butter

As I've posted on this blog, once or twice, I'm not a big fan of Darwinism. For many reasons, which I'm not going to go into here, I'm about as sure that it doesn't stack up as I can be about anything

I am also equally sure that mainstream scientific orthodoxy on the closely-related, though not the same, subject of abiogenesis - the spontaneous generation of Life from inanimate matter is also pretty ropey

It's not a question about abiogenesis being hugely improbable. As things stand, within the restrictions of our current level of knowledge, abiogenesis is flat out impossibile. There is nothing like a viable theory to explain how something as simple as a single-celled organism (not simple at all) can spring into existence out of its constituents chemical parts. And as for actually replicating that process in a lab, forget it.

Put simply, the notion that life spontaneously sprang out of nothing is currently a faith based belief; anchored on two extremely sophisticated scientific principles which only someone with a brain as large as Richard Dawkins' can comprehend...

  1. Life must have come from somewhere

  2. There's no fucking way I'm bringing God or Space Aliens into it

And if anyone bumping into this post thinks they can pull me up on this; without reverting to Dawkins-style bullshit and deceit, I'd genuinely love to hear from them (False-choice, 'you're either with us or against us', proofs that people who believe in Jesus are wrong about the origins of Life and therefore Dawkins must be right definitely don't count)

Over the years I've seen several thoughtful, intelligent attempts to communicate the deficiencies in mainstream science's attempts to grapple with abiogenesis

This is not one of them...

Peanut Butter, The Atheist's Nightmare!

I originally posted a link to that video on the Conspiraloon Alliance blog and wasn't going to bother replicating the post here

However, someone posted a link to another Masterpiece of Food-based Creationist PR in a comment underneath...

The atheist's nightmare: the banana

Where this Creationist obsession with high-calorie sandwich fillings comes from God(?) only knows, though it does apparently have its limits. Follow-up searches for titles such as 'Why Secular Humanists Fear Spreadable Marshmallow' and 'Jam - The Agnostic's Nemesis' on Google/ Youtube have, so far, stubbornly refused to yield any positive results :(



Anonymous said...

LOL. That poo covered penis looks remarkably like a banana covered with lashings of peanut butter.

Ryanair is derivitising into the world of advertising so I'm lead to believe.

Stef said...

Stef's Top 3 List of companies he'd like to see fail miserably as a result of the impending economic meltdown...

#1 Ryan Air

#2 Ryan Air again, maybe after a last minute rescue package

#3 Any company with a name that sounds a bit like Ryan Air so that I Can re-live the joy of #'s 1 and 2 all over again...

Tom said...

Nice to see the Chuckle Brothers representing Aussie Creationism.

Elliott explained: "I was feeling like Marlon Brando in the film The Wild Ones when suddenly I took this blind and steep curve in the road.

"To my horror, a shepherd steering goats down the steep road had the goats all over the place. I knew if I didn't brake and swerve, I would have gone into them.

"As I braked I lost control and I'm not sure exactly what happened. The next thing I knew, I was on the floor with the motorbike on top of me."

A friend of the star said: "Paul's main embarrassment was when a group of British tourists recognised him. As he was struggling to get the bike off him, he heard chants of 'To me, to you' followed by laughter."


Stef said...

Nice to see the Chuckle Brothers representing Aussie Creationism.


How could I have been so blind not to have noticed?

Alex Fear said...

In the spirit of blogidarity and warning badges for Bloggers Unite To Fight Against Common Enemy BUTFACE(TM), surely you could come up with a badge that combines these fear-inducing fillers to ward off atheists from one's blog?

Stef said...


given that a large proportion of my friends and acquaintances are heathen lefties I could be running a risk of being misunderstood

there is, however, nothing to stop me slipping them a few fair trade (and 100% vegetarian) peanut butter and banana sandwiches and asking them how they slept the next day

Stef said...

On the subject of heathen lefties and people of religious faith it might be worth pointing out that the likes of Marx and Lenin didn't have as big a problem with religion as they are usually depicted as having

My understanding is that Marx was of the opinion that the religious impulse was a reaction against the earthly exploitation of ordinary people he was writing about and that, consequently, the religious faith of ordinary people should be be treated with some sympathy.

Marx's cunning plan being that when his Workers' Paradise on Earth was achieved people would simply stop bothering to go to church of their own accord

So, to be honest, and given Jesus' own slightly left of centre behaviour, I don't actually see there being much of theoretical problem with heathen lefties and believers rubbing along indefinitely whilst waiting to see which of their respective dream worlds is manifest first

Guareschi had a stab at covering this kind of ground with his Don Camillo short stories but, even though I think they're a good read, he did favour one side

Shahid said...

Glad we're both writing about evolution - would love to hear more from you on this.

May I plug my post (you've probably seen it already) on this please?

Merkin said...

I should have put Don Camillo on my list of favourite books. Thanx for reminding me. As you say, he did favour the one side but was still more of a Devil's Advocate than you would see nowadays.
Splendid stuff.

Tom said...

I made a cake out of bananas, and put peanut butter on a slice. New life, and delicious too!

Stef said...

I should have put Don Camillo on my list of favourite books. Thanx for reminding me... Splendid stuff.

...worthy of including in any discerning connoisseur of the arts' book list purely on the basis of Brian Blessed's outstanding portrayal of Peppone in the BBC adaptation of the stories - a performance which leaves his legendary turn as Prince Vultan in Flash looking quiet and understated

Stef said...

"Don Camillo's ALIVE?!!"

Stef said...


all new life is delicious