An inspiring tale for our times
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To write a best-selling work of fiction many authors will spend years observing the human condition. In their minds they will weave intricate plots and sub plots to delight and entertain their readers. They will write 200,000 words or more of skilfully crafted prose. Fascinating and compelling characters will be conjured up and a tangible sense of place magically communicated through the simple medium of paper and ink.
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Alternatively, they could write an illustrated children's story about a mole with a dog turd on its head.
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Yes, The Story of the Little Mole Who Knew It Was None of His Business.
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Eat your long-dead hearts out, Enid Blyton and Roald Dahl.
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I have never heard of this book before yesterday, when someone gave a copy to my little niece. This was a 10th anniversary edition of the 'much loved children's story that has sold over a million copies world wide'.
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The book tells the heart warming story of a mole who wakes up with a pile of poo on his head. The mole goes on a quest to find out who did this to him by comparing the poo on his head with poo from a variety of new animal friends he meets on his travels. This classic tale reaches its thrilling climax when the little mole eventually discovers that he is wearing a hat made from dog turd.
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I hope I haven’t spoiled it for anyone by giving away the ending.
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Earlier on in my blogging career someone, from the Mid West of America I think, made a comment that I should try and use the word poop rather than shit in my blogs. I've compromised by using the word turd as often as I can instead. I appreciate that some people who run into my blog may still find my chosen word offensive and skip away from my blog as a consequence. Which would be a shame.
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It's only a word though. I do find it strange that someone can publish a book about animal shit and illustrate each page with different pictures of cute animals taking a dump and get away with it. The secret is to use euphemisms like 'business' or 'poop' and no-one seems to mind. Reviewers on Amazon love it …
To write a best-selling work of fiction many authors will spend years observing the human condition. In their minds they will weave intricate plots and sub plots to delight and entertain their readers. They will write 200,000 words or more of skilfully crafted prose. Fascinating and compelling characters will be conjured up and a tangible sense of place magically communicated through the simple medium of paper and ink.
.
Alternatively, they could write an illustrated children's story about a mole with a dog turd on its head.
.
Yes, The Story of the Little Mole Who Knew It Was None of His Business.
.
Eat your long-dead hearts out, Enid Blyton and Roald Dahl.
.
I have never heard of this book before yesterday, when someone gave a copy to my little niece. This was a 10th anniversary edition of the 'much loved children's story that has sold over a million copies world wide'.
.
The book tells the heart warming story of a mole who wakes up with a pile of poo on his head. The mole goes on a quest to find out who did this to him by comparing the poo on his head with poo from a variety of new animal friends he meets on his travels. This classic tale reaches its thrilling climax when the little mole eventually discovers that he is wearing a hat made from dog turd.
.
I hope I haven’t spoiled it for anyone by giving away the ending.
.
Earlier on in my blogging career someone, from the Mid West of America I think, made a comment that I should try and use the word poop rather than shit in my blogs. I've compromised by using the word turd as often as I can instead. I appreciate that some people who run into my blog may still find my chosen word offensive and skip away from my blog as a consequence. Which would be a shame.
.
It's only a word though. I do find it strange that someone can publish a book about animal shit and illustrate each page with different pictures of cute animals taking a dump and get away with it. The secret is to use euphemisms like 'business' or 'poop' and no-one seems to mind. Reviewers on Amazon love it …
The last time I came across an author becoming a millionaire through writing about turd was, of course, Dan Brown and The Da Vinci Code.
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A gang stole £22m from a bank in Ireland last week and I remember thinking 'Dan Brown has escaped with four times that much money and he isn’t even being hunted by the police'.
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The good news is that he is being sued by the authors of the books he most shamelessly plagiarised in coming up with his Masterpoop.
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By my reckoning, Brown lifted material wholesale from three books in particular. He arguably stole plot elements from Lewis Perdue's not very good novels The Da Vinci Legacy and The Daughter of God and DEFINITELY ripped off all of his 'meticulous background research' from Baigent, Lincoln and Leigh's The Holy Blood and Holy Grail.
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Leigh and Baigent's solicitors are currently sharpening their knives. There is much wrong with The Holy Blood and Holy Grail and amusingly Dan Brown has copied material from the earlier book without realising that much has been discredited by subsequent research. If Brown had done a simple Google search before copying wholesale chunks out of THBTHG it might not now be so blatantly obvious who he was ripping off. He is onto such a loser.
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It will also be interesting to find out how Brown explains away the fact that the key baddie in his novel is called Leigh Teabing. The name Leigh Teabing is an anagram of Leigh and Baigent while his physical description, he walks with the aid of crutches, is presumably based on the third author, Henry Lincoln, who walks with a limp.
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Once that case is over I hope someone else takes out a follow-up class action on behalf of the English language for severe and unjustifiable adjective and adverb abuse. It’s not just children and animals, words have feelings too.
.
.
A gang stole £22m from a bank in Ireland last week and I remember thinking 'Dan Brown has escaped with four times that much money and he isn’t even being hunted by the police'.
.
The good news is that he is being sued by the authors of the books he most shamelessly plagiarised in coming up with his Masterpoop.
.
By my reckoning, Brown lifted material wholesale from three books in particular. He arguably stole plot elements from Lewis Perdue's not very good novels The Da Vinci Legacy and The Daughter of God and DEFINITELY ripped off all of his 'meticulous background research' from Baigent, Lincoln and Leigh's The Holy Blood and Holy Grail.
.
Leigh and Baigent's solicitors are currently sharpening their knives. There is much wrong with The Holy Blood and Holy Grail and amusingly Dan Brown has copied material from the earlier book without realising that much has been discredited by subsequent research. If Brown had done a simple Google search before copying wholesale chunks out of THBTHG it might not now be so blatantly obvious who he was ripping off. He is onto such a loser.
.
It will also be interesting to find out how Brown explains away the fact that the key baddie in his novel is called Leigh Teabing. The name Leigh Teabing is an anagram of Leigh and Baigent while his physical description, he walks with the aid of crutches, is presumably based on the third author, Henry Lincoln, who walks with a limp.
.
Once that case is over I hope someone else takes out a follow-up class action on behalf of the English language for severe and unjustifiable adjective and adverb abuse. It’s not just children and animals, words have feelings too.
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5 comments:
Aaaaah, I hate this when it happens
Some years ago I wrote on a web page that photographer Bill Eggleston's pictures were rubbish. Then, more than a year later, I get an email from Bill Eggleston who appears to be a very decent chap indeed.
Please excuse me. I didn't say your book was rubbish, just not very good. I could have gone on to say that it is considerably less annoying and more original than that other book, which I loathe so much.
Also, you're published, which is about 5 billion light years from where I'm sitting. Kudos.
I wish you the very best of fortune in your case. It's hard to see how an impartial individual could not pick up on the blatant plagiary, but who ever said the World was fair?
That's one of the aspects of the success of the Da Vinci Code that has left me puzzled. Several other authors have covered this material before and had nothing like the success of that book. I've heard many people say 'Dan Brown's book isn;t that well written but it's full of interesting ideas'. Yes, ideas that have been out there for 20 years or more.
It must all be down to marketing and that's a very depressing thought.
Never, ever apologize for an honest opinion! Nobody's book is ever loved by everybody ... and I think a few of my earlier ones ARE rubbish.
Oops sorry ...
I couldn't resist that one ;-)
Yes, beauty is in the eye of the beholder and that gives us all hope. In fairness to myself (!), I only softened my stated opinion slightly because, on reflection, it was unduly harsh. If Dan Brown were to leave a friendly post on my blog, no, I wouldn't change my stated opinion on that guy's work.
I was incensed when I read a borrowed copy of The Da Vinci Code and felt ripped-off, even though a) I hadn't bought it and b) It wasn't me he was lifting material from.
Anyway, I sincerely wish you (and the other people) taking action the very best of luck. To my mind there's a world of difference between being inspired by others' work and lifting from them bodily; though I haven't the foggiest how that can be proven in court.
"... I haven't the foggiest how that can be proven in court."
I have a foggy idea, but that's about as good as it gets.
The estimates from a broad spectrum of copyright lawyers is that a case like mine will be decided about 30% on the facts of the issue and 70% on the "lawyering" and luck (or its lack) of the draw on the judge and how s/he feels on a given day.
In other words, no matter how good a case like mine may be on the facts, the irrational, fuzzy elements are more important.
When Kafka wrote "The Trial" he had no idea that things could get even weirder.
The odds are as good as that?
I read The Trial fairly early in life, about 12 I think. Now that I'm older, I appreciate that it is a metaphor about life but I first read it literally and it works pretty good on that level as well.
The prospect of dealing with lawyers always turns my blood cold and they have never failed to meet my expectations. But what can you do ...
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